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- The Italian Dating Scene as Viewed by an Expat in Rome Italy
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Want to ask something and make a comment. Living in the Netherlands, I see mixed race couples all the time, not just in Amsterdam but in the small towns as well. It seems to me that the openness and curiosity that Italians had 40 years ago when I was a student in Rome has disappeared.
As an African- American, I felt like a novelty then. Girls would approach me and start conversations because they were curious about where I was from and even guys would hit on me. One of my former teachers, who is 91, says that Romans have indeed changed; they have become more fearful of foreigners because Rome is filled with so many.
You could just enter the street, come up to the building and ring the bell. Now there is a gate at the end of the street. I have to buzz you in. You were here in the mids, the beginning of the era of prosperity. Now we are in the age of unemployment. Anyway, perhaps, as an Italian, your wife could add her perspective. Is there much inter-racial dating there? Has Italy become xenophobic? These are great questions, and probably a topic I should address on my blog. In some ways, the Italian version is more honest…meaning that to me, the foreigner, it seems acceptable to openly label someone based on their ethnicity without any ill intentions.
In the US, I think political correctness sometimes hides latent racism. Thanks for replying to my comment. For me, as a person of color, racism and xenophobia are very closely related and often indistinguishable. In the Netherlands often Africans and Moroccans are associated with crime, but the Dutch can easily distinguish me, an American, from them and even from the Surinamese.
Thus, I am able to go to about in jeans and a T-shirt with no hassles. In Rome, however, I feel I have to be dressed to the nines just to go to the grocery. I miss the Italy of my student days. But to treat people differently based on their race is totally unacceptable. As a result, Google now sends such […]. Thanks for dampening my dream!
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Obviously, my article was meant to be a bit tongue-in-cheek ok, maybe more than a bit. Some of them are heartbreakers, you are right. Of course, I have nothing against Italian men, but I think they are still behind Italian women. Your pics with Jessica and Demetra are simply beautiful. Manners and formalities are not only important in Italy, but they are […].
I still have not met a single Italian woman. It seems impossible for a foreign man to meet a native woman.
Meanwhile, foreign women meet local men by the dozen. I have lived in several countries -the UK, Argentina, Brazil, Spain and the Netherlands- and always met locals, men as well as women. I have some theories, but I need to devise a poll for Italian women to see if I can get some hard data. I am quite sure the article you have in mind will be a success. There must be a zillion articles on foreign women and Italian men, but hardly one single article on the other combination. Also interesting are the Italian-language articles on http: Perhaps the motives of foreign girls in Rome explain why Italian girls are so diffident of foreign men.
An outsider had to be accepted by the entire clicca before the girl would trust him. It would also part of the social protocol game where the girl needs to be seen to be hard to get. Hey Carly, thanks for your perspective!
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I just started following you and Im glad I did! Thanks for the laugh. Hi Ann, thanks so much!! I can offer the perspective of an Italian woman living in NYC — and yes, unfortunately American men do come across as a bit bland to us, courtship-wise. Italian women will take initiative, but here in the US men freak out if the girl makes the first step, which is quite amusing, and works out well in the end — it becomes self-selective.
Not in a mean way, but it is entertaining. I would also add that Italian women, at present, are significantly LESS interested in marriage than American women, and I am talking about educated, upper-middle class urban American women. And it works out for the best for people who do end up marrying us, because chances are it means we really wanted to marry. Best wishes for your little girl! You have put it better than I could have.pop.mail.ruk-com.in.th/craving-the-sitter-first-time-older-man.php
The Italian Dating Scene as Viewed by an Expat in Rome Italy
Thanks for the wishes for the bambina…she is really a joy and it will be interesting to see which culture she gravitates towards as she gets older. I really enjoyed reading this. It was in a very romantic way. I kept making eye contact with him and thought he was extremely handsome. Then hours later I saw a friend request from him on Facebook. He wrote my name down and found me on there.
He wrote me a beautiful message and left his number but said that he would only be in New York for 2 more days. We met up the next day and I had such an amazing time with him. Now that he is back in Torino he texts me everyday and sends the most beautiful messages and videos. Saying that he feels a spark too and is so happy he met me and that he tells everyone about me. But I am also quite aware of the Italian charm.
I am nervous that his messages may be insincere while mine are very sincere. He works for a big italian soccer team and said he might have a week off in September. I am debating flying out to see him because I have always wanted to go to Europe and he is from the town my great grandfather is from so I would love to see it. What are your thoughts. Also I am 23 and he is Wow, what a great story…very romantic!
We just never know and putting too much pressure on it up front is the quickest way to sabotage the situation. In bocca al lupo! Ah this brings back memories! I did meet a charming man from Italy, while in San Fran. This nice man was 80 years old…. Cute story if nothing else! Ha, ha, interesting advice from an 80 year-old! But yes, I suppose that would have been a typical attitude in that generation.
Thanks for sharing, Melissia!
In large, Russians and Italians are perfectly compatible, because of having a lot in common and they can easily find a common language if they both wish. Most often it is that Russian woman decides to move to Italy after marriage. Like most Russian women they consider Italy the most beautiful country in the world, but also Italy is highly developed western country, unlike Russia, where only Moscow and big cities are good for comfort life.
But there are also Italian men who have decided to move into the former Soviet Union, as now it is kind of trendy in Italy. If a man wants to be happy in marriage, not depending on the nationality, what qualities he better forget of? He has not to be boring and dull, passive and lethargic. At the same time woman does not has to be selfish. In love, only part of the person can be selfish, the one that is responsible for self-love, but selfishness should not apply to partner.
People need to complement each other, to go to meet each other, to constantly seek and find compromises. But here it is necessary to comply with the measure and does not go to extremes. Both, the one who lives together as if he is still alone, and the one, who forgets himself for another are not right. Two full identities must exist in balance and harmony with each other.
The Russian girls are desirable by their beauty and femininity and the country — the culture, literature, great writers, classical music, traditions and education. And all this culture has somehow left a mark on the image of women. Feminine beauty, like the mentality of all the peoples of the world, it is impossible to grasp, even for all life. In this case many choose Russia. On February 14th, most of Russian women dream of a marriage proposal and what is expected of the day by Italian women?
On a holiday it is best simply to make a girlfriend happy. On Montecatini's school rolls, an increasing number of blond, blue-eyed children answer to mixed Italian and Russian names. Sometimes, however, the women's dreams of securing a better life in the West go horribly wrong. In , two "ballerinas" were murdered in the town. Elena Davydova, 25, from Russia was found in her flat strangled with a nylon stocking. Last year, another Russian woman who had moved to Montecatini was murdered.
Revelations about the seamier side of life in the spa offend respectable members of the eastern European population. Many work as maids in the hotels, and some have dance schools or teach ballet or gymnastics. There is no delinquency among them.
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